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Hi,
This page is a central point for all
situations that present a risk to yourself, or to others, whatever capacity you
are operating in. If you came in from another page you will usually have been
'jumped' to a bookmark somewhere further down on this page. If you are here to deal with
an emergency, please
click here
There are separate pages for each section below. These will be listed on the
left of this page. The links give more details and also provide external links,
to other websites that may be useful in the circumstances that you are in. The
Links will hopefully, also serve as a support and training guide to none
specialist Professionals and Family Carers.
This page is effectively a summary list of Emergency Procedures and
recommended type of contact and actions, that should be taken. Initially this
list is dedicated to the UK 'system', but there will often be similar services
and organisations in other developed countries.
If you are a reader / observer from a country that has less supportive
services, a significantly different form of service, or even a better form of
service, please take some consolation from the additional advice that we offer
here.
In less stressing circumstances, please let us know about the services you
know of and suggestions for improvement to our site, so that we can publish them
here in a way that will be most beneficial. In your language, taking account of
your culture, and with your own suggested links, if you are willing to do that
work for us.
Physical Assault (Including Rape & Sexual
Assault):
Physical assault of any kind and any degree, including any sexual assault and
rape.
If you are representing someone who is a 'Vulnerable Adult', who is inhibited
from representing themselves, by virtue of limited capacity 'at this time and in
this respect', and you suspect has experienced any Abuse, of any kind please go
to:
Help Link
Call Emergency Services: If
this has just happened. It is important that you contact the Police as soon as
you can. Call 999, 911, or the usual local emergency services, asking for Police
and Ambulance attendance. Do it straight away. Give all the details you can.
Try and stay calm and answer each of the Assistants questions clearly. Take
deep breaths, control your breathing and be aware the assistant will be patient. Your
exact location is very important. Describe the area well. A local officer will
usually know where you are talking about, especially if you can see a pub, or other landmark.
Arrangements will be made for a police officer to visit you, or for you to
visit the police station. Sometimes the arrangement will be interview in the
'Vulnerable Adult' Suite:
Help
Link. Where there are injuries, there may be need to take photo's
& Videos and to take personal samples that will be needed as evidence. This will
be done sensitively.
Assuming you are now making contact with the Police, go to:
Next Section
Call Local Police Station:
If this is a realisation that an on-going problem of personal abuse, or one
stemming from the past, that you believe needs attending to 'criminally'. Then
phone your local police station as soon as you feel ready and able.
You may find yourself in contact with a central Call Control. You will
be asked about the nature of your problem and some basic details about you, the
perpetrator and the circumstances will be asked.
Please let them know if there are still any kinds of personal risks that
remain, as a consequence of this relationship, either to yourself, your
children, or to others (Particularly Vulnerable People and Children).
Give the person as much detail as you can, both in response to their
questions, and in respect of what you believe are the important points from your
own perspective. Try and stay calm, but if you get upset, they will understand.
Take the time necessary.
Depending upon the urgency of the problem, they will arrange and 'interview'
with you, at a police station, or they will arrange for an appropriate Police
Officer to get back to you and make arrangements to meet.
This meeting could be at you home, at Police Station, or in a Vulnerable
Adults suite. Where it happens will largely depend upon what facilities are
available, if they are accessible at the time and what your wishes are.
Vulnerable Adult Teams are skilled interviewers who arrange the interview so
that it is not too intimidating: You
as a Vulnerable Adult,
or
Vulnerable Adults. They still have a duty to collect facts and
these need clarifying and checking, so try not to be offended by the questions.
It is all in your interests in the end. There has to be a case made in Law and
that requires careful collection of evidence.
Apart from the special support you will get at the Police Station you will
also have access to the
Victim Support service locally. It may go by other names
in other countries but there will be some kind of statutory supported &/or
voluntary agency available. Further Website contacts are listed on the right of
this page.
There is UK governmental information available (see links to the right) dealing
with a whole host of problems you may be experiencing. Your legal position will
be clarified and you entitlements to support will be explained. It is not
perfect but it is a good start.
Some of the points below may still be appropriate to your position. Check
them out and do the best you can. Look to get help from a good friend, who you
can trust not to be too judgmental. Forgive them if they get angry when they
hear your story. Follow the law.
Protect the evidence: In the
case of a serious assault, do not clean up the environment of a assault, or
yourself, unless you really feel you have to. If you do clean yourself up, keep
all the materials you used for the police to have analysed.
If, as is sometimes the case with what are described; common assaults, the
response by police is poor, you will have little choice but to clean yourself
and your environment up, at least to some degree. Please do so cautiously.
Use plastic bags to place items that may have significance in terms of
evidence and leave larger damaged items where they are for now. Just make things
safe and liveable with. Follow TV's CSI strategies and avoid destroying
evidence. Delay tidying as long as you can anyway. Go to a local friends home if
it is too distressing. Let the police know your movements.
You are a victim of a crime, you don't have to be victimised. You are not
required to be a 'Victim'. Assist the police teams in supporting your case in
the future, even if you do not feel confident about this at the time. Even if
the police, for some reason, appear to be unsympathetic (which can happen
sometimes - and is explained further on:
Help Link).
Protect Your Integrity:
The 'You asked for it'; 'Don't be pathetic' and 'The Police will laugh at you',
type of retorts, and other 'bullying' styles and strategies, should not carry
weight in Law. Do not allow them to carry weight with you if you have
experienced them.
These, and other prejudices, may sometimes exist with some individual police
attitudes (they are human), but they are obliged to follow procedure. Some
prejudices are institutional and can, if your face doesn't fit, affect you obtaining your entitlements in
Law.
If the response you get is not problematic then ignore the rest of this
section. It is for some people who occasionally get a bad deal. It has to be
dealt with and needs to be here in case additional support is needed. Further
sections nay be unnecessary also check them out quickly to be sure. Go to
Don't
Shoot the Messenger.
Prejudice of any kind is not acceptable but sadly, you will have to patiently assert you
entitlement in these respects. Just stick to the facts and request that your
grievance be considered, on the same basis of any other, equivalent, reasonable
complainants (Victim of Crime).
If you are Male assaulted by a Female, or practice as a Prostitute, or are in
any way already known to the police (on the wrong side). This is no reason for
you to treated any differently, or with any less respect. By the same token,
don't assume that you will be treated differently. This will affect how you
present and create its own problems.
Don't loose your temper, that is what prejudiced people want, loose your temper and you
could loose your case. You will probably loose the argument. Let them loose
theirs and smile if you can. Even this will make them angry but evidence of your reasonable
behaviour will be on record.
Stay Cool, Get Legal Advice and shop around. It has become difficult to get
adequate 'free' advice, and almost impossible to get free 'advocacy', which is
adequate to challenge resistance by Police and the Public Prosecutors office to
get your case heard, especially it there is counter claims and you are
prejudiced against.
Get any help you can, if you find your rights and entitlements flaunted, or
dismissed. We are living the ridiculous situation (in a civilised society) where
entitlement to justice has been severely curtailed and, at the same time, we may
be required to 'pay for' the 'adequate' (equitable) information and support to
get the justice we each deserve.
For all the advancements we have made in Human Rights, we have actually moved
backwards by 'ensuring' that many people do not know, or are made to feel
inadequate, or made to feel they are not entitled to these Rights. This trend
will affect everyone eventually and only then will we see a reversion back
towards real, equitable Justice.
Don't Shoot the
Messenger:
Some of the following sections are not critical
to your legal support, but the information may be helpful if you do meet
problems in getting your rights and entitlements under the Law and Convention of
Human Rights (which are now 'Law' in most Western Cultures and are 'Law', or
have been ratified by many others countries - They are the basis for
International Law). These sections will eventually for a separate document that
will have links here.
Not in the public interest!:
This is a typical assertion by 'prosecuting officers' (and some police), where there is
some doubt, given the balance and weight of evidence of the victim and the
accused, that a case is viable to succeed in court. It does not mean you have
not been assaulted, although that is poor consolation when this happens.
It is a judgment, sought to save pubic funds and prevent unreasonable waste
of valuable resources. It is over used and sometimes miss used. There are inadequate
resources to adequately support you in preparing your evidence, in ways that do
not 'prejudice' your evidence, by inadvertently 'leading' you. Police have to be
'independent' of the evidence.
This is not a 'normal' Police problem, or their 'normal' responsibility. They
'have' to avoid 'leading' you in any significant way. It could affect your case
if it came to court.. They must remain impartial to your
evidence, other than in skilfully collecting it, sifting through it and
comparing against that of the accused. They then have to consider this evidence
with the prosecutor, to satisfy themselves it will stand up in court.
There is a problem of the adequate availability of 'Advocacy', or of those
that can skilfully support you in 'speaking up' for yourself. This often just means
that it would be too expensive to do and the outcome of police efforts (given
their lack of experience in the less clear, less obvious instances) are likely
to fail.
This may also be because of their limited efforts to process a case (often for good institutional
reasons), and the inadequate Guidence you will often obtain in presenting your
evidence to them. It is important to get additional support and advice at all
stages, starting right now.
One of the factors here; is how good a witness you would make in court. This
is assessed by how well you were able to present your evidence to them in the
police station and how this may be seen to reflect on past events, eventually in court.
There are improved
Police Resources for this but these tend to be restricted to the current, limited
definition of what constitutes a 'Vulnerable Adult'. There is some flexibility
though, around the issue of intimidation & fear. Other factors, are also
considered:
Vulnerable Adult:
I would advocate that anyone who has a sound, or reasonable case but the
chance of success is low (compared with a more articulate, better resource
defendant), may be considered to be a Vulnerable Adult. This vulnerability would
be by virtue of the person's persistent, or temporary, difficulties in
expressing a grievance &/or presenting evidence in the usual
verbal form, for any reason'; by virtue of temporary, or persistent,
intellectual, emotional 'inhibition', disability, or fear.
Stated simply; If you are currently unable to express yourself
adequately, because you are somehow inhibited, lack confidence, have problems
with language (including your own), or lack the
motivation to pursue, or adequately support a case against someone who has
assaulted you (in any way); you should be entitled to consideration as a 'Vulnerable Adult'.
Fear & experiencing intimidation are adequate grounds for this kind of support,
whatever the nature & degree of intimidation. This is not about being
'stupid', its about being 'naive' of the incredibly dishonest & abusive
behaviour of people, and the clever ways that they 'cover' themselves. It
makes you feel stupid.
By going down this route, you (or someone on your behalf), would seek
'special measures', to obtain extra support and alternative facilities (video
interviews, non-verbal communication, and drama recreations, etc.), to develop
and even present your case in court. Using these special measures helps ensure
that the story you have to tell has an good opportunity to be
considered by the court, with a reasonable chance of success.
There are still 'Legal Centres' that will consider special circumstances that
present difficult issues and complex cases. There may be such a free, generally
available 'Advocacy', or 'Legal Service' in your area. An IMCA
(Independent Mental Capacity Act) Advocate may also be appropriate.
Don't be put off by the title, or reference to 'mental health'. Any of us can
be vulnerable at times and this can affect our 'Capacity' to fully understand
the risks that we are facing and how we can best resolve the problems we have.
This can be temporary and limited to specific areas of our lives.
If you have a social
worker, health worker, or probation officer, they should be able to help. If not,
you can also ask at a Solicitors who display the 'free legal advice' logo - (2
people sitting face to face across a table). Make sure that your status as a
'vulnerable person' is adequately considered. It is a relatively 'new' insight.
If you are identified as having a more persistent Mental Health, Learning
Difficulty, or Severe Addiction, or Sensory Problems; If you have any identified
health, or social problem that inhibits you ability to protect yourself, or
understand the impact of your own and others actions, or implications of legal
actions for, or against you. If you
lack 'capacity', in any of these respects, you should be entitled to support from
the Police, as a Vulnerable Adult. It is their duty to recognise and appreciate
this.
The kind of support that you then get makes the whole process less
distressing and I would hope that increasing numbers of people will be dealt
with through this special process. Once it is proven, I am sure we can encourage
this. This special support includes very professional police interviewers - none
of your 'Sweeny' types. The environment in which you are interviewed is more
relaxing and less distressing. All you reasonable request will be considered,
even if you have been partially in the wrong (by your own standards, or those of
police and courts).
If part of the problem is that you feel intimidated by police, or
officials, this will help, as these are specially selected and trained officers,
who have a good understanding of your position and concerns. There are good, bad
and indifferent people in all walks of life. Each has their role and niche in
the wide range of problems they face.
In
this special situation I can confidently say that you will get the best of
treatment and a very open & honest approach. You will not be isolated and there
will be other officers about, both men and women. You may even have a friend
attend with you, although they should let you do the talking in the main.
Normal 'Adult' Police Process:
Under normal circumstances of policing and interviewing, whether you are the
one who is alleged to have transgressed in some way, or you are the 'victim'
of a crime, the police have to stay relatively impartial. This does not mean
that they have to be rude, insensitive, judgmental.
The fact is, though, individual officers will behave inappropriately.
Individual officer have their own issues and problems. If you respond badly then
they get what they are seeking. Grounds on which they feel justified to continue
to treat you inappropriately. Don't let these 'unprofessional' officer get to
you. Just note the behaviour and report it.
Women who have suffered physical &/or
sexual assault, have much better treatment these days but there is still a need
for police officer to check the facts. Rape victims are often treated as 'Vulnerable', as described above.
All children below 16 and some adolescents up to about 19, with special needs,
at treated as 'Vulnerable' also.
Adult Males do not have such a good deal. This is largely due to cynicism
concerning the behaviour of Adult Males. Unless you are elderly and frail, have
an obvious disability, or clearly have what is understood to be a 'no fault'
type problem; your treatment is likely to be less sympathetic. Its a Man thing.
If you had been drinking, or present as 'angry' (even where you are the 'victim'
of crime) you may be judged as aggressive.
You may not feel you are being aggressive. This is how it may be perceived by
the untrained. Your anger may be entirely justified and appropriate to what has
happened to you, including how the police have (or have not) responded. If you
are (were) being 'aggressive and threatening', once you were away from the
original danger, then I can have little sympathy. If you were angry because of
an assault and then angry with the police for not dealing with you respectfully
and promptly, that I can support anger.
Some Police officers, and other Officials, including Care Professionals, need
better training and basic insight in recognising the different forms that anger
can come in. Not just paint everyone who speaks in a particular way, or
has 'attitude' as the same 'colour'. Everyone has a right to be 'righteously
angry' at times, for themselves and for others (and often both). Martin Luther
King was, Ghandi was, J F Kennedy, Christ was, for Christ sake (and everybody
else's).
Other great pacifists and seekers of peace & justice, from various political
and religious backgrounds, have been righteously angry at times. Without it, not
much would have changed. Sometimes, clever words on their own, don't get the
attention of the more ignorant community leaders and officials. Anger breaks
through excuses and the bullshit. That said, it should only be used to the point
where the crack can be seen in the excuses. From then on, firm assertions and
reasonable demands are adequate. These will be criticised also but don't justify
the continued dismissal of the issues they highlight.
Don't be put off by 'judgments' that may be made, by anyone (including
from past experiences). Also, try not to be offended by genuine attempts to get
to the 'facts'. There is a subtle difference in the actions of
police & others, in these respects. Sometimes this separation of 'being judgmental' and 'getting to the facts',
gets blurred. Assert yourself against judgmental attitudes but also answer any
reasonable questions, (once asked non-judgmentally) honestly.
Politely point out any judgmentally, or complain of this later, to higher
authority. It is the only way to change attitudes. Mean while you will need to
gain cooperation in seeking redress for the assault & various injuries,
including 'social trauma'. Try to remember that, if we were being wrongfully accused, we would hope that
the Police would check both sides of the story. We would just agree that this
should be done sensitively and respectfully, as we now wish, in checking your
circumstances.
Getting at the facts should be sensitive and respectful process, whoever you
are and whatever your 'past', race, creed, colour sex, size, or age. The
assumption should be that you are reporting an incident where you were not
culpable (to blame). this should remain the case, unless there is clear evidence
to the contrary, or, a counter claim by the alleged assailant. They have right
too, until the evidence proves otherwise by 'due process'.
These injuries should therefore be assumed to be as a result of an unprovoked
assault, or, an assault resulting from what is an ordinary disagreement, where
the assault is a wholly disproportionate and unreasonable response to the
situation. (ie: You had not 'physically engaged with them, without unreasonable
provocation, other than in reasonable defence of yourself).
Assault is assault, whoever it is done by and to whoever it is
done, irrespective of race, sex, colour, size, age, or background. Big boys do
not have to put up with assaults from little women and big girls are entitled
not to be assaulted by little men. We know that Officials and Leader don't
always understand that, never mind the 'logical' reason why this should be the
case, for the good of all.
We do and we will explain, painstakingly, for as long
as it takes, till the changes are made to attitudes. This is largely what the
Website is about: Checks and Balances; Alternative Perspectives; Active Justice;
Contexts of Actions; Correction of Prejudice & Bias; True, Informed Choices; and
may other wonderful concepts that are inadequately applied in good practice. All
based upon the simple principles of 'Human Rights'.
Reflections on the Law: We are supposedly treated equally in
the eyes of the 'Law'. Culpability in Law is assumed to start, or to be
established, between 10-14 years of age, depending upon intellectual & social
development of the child and area of social/criminal behaviour.
Children should not be assaulted, but neither should they be allowed to
'assault' others of their own age, younger, or adults. Because of legal
restrictions, 'normal', accepted 'defensive' strategies are often inappropriate
for use with children. This makes adults vulnerable to manipulation.
If an older child assaults an adult, it is the Adult who is at the
disadvantage; in feeling unable to safely and appropriately defend themselves. The Law is there to protect
Adults as well as the Child, or Youth, in these circumstances. This is to avoid Adults
having to resort to normal, legal Adult means to rectify the situation (physical
defence).
Parents and other members of the community, my be culpable; in respect of the
fact that a child may assume they can assault you (and Adult). Any Adult 'encouraging' a
child to assault you, is culpable (to blame) and should be reported along with
the child.
Similarly, and adult male wishing to record an assault by a female, of any
size (and, in fact, of 'lighter' build in particular) is often at a legal and
social disadvantage, if he wishes to withhold 'defensive' retaliation. This is
often reported as a 'primary' assault.
This bias is often used by unscrupulous men and women (and youths), to
provoke a physical reaction from the partners of either sex and from members of
peer groups. It is a bullying technique that tries to 'reverse' the culpability
for the bullying.
That said, please respect the fact that that bias, although unjust and
inappropriate, is there for good reason. Women have been bullied and assaulted
unjustly and without full protection in Law, in the past. This bias needs
adjusting, that is all.
Women (and other disadvantaged groups) have rightfully earned equality under
the Law, in this and other respect. Modern Women enjoy that protection now, and
with comes the responsibility and culpability, when they miss-use their
situation to disadvantage others.
Whoever you are, you are right to resist taking 'physical retaliation', or
basic 'defensive action', in these circumstances (wherever you can). If you are 'male', you are usually seen as
culpable in 'defending' yourself against unreasonable, intrusive &
abusive behaviour, including assault, if the abuser, or assailant is female, a
child or smaller in size.
Institutions do not adequately appreciate this and it is unjust for the
reasons given. None-the-less; Report such incidents without shame. It protects you and others. That is the
purpose of the Law, which should not discriminate. You may expect some
significant prejudice & may even be judged for physically defending yourself,
even minimally.
Let the police and the courts judge the balance of assault and injury. If you
are clear in your perceptions that you were assaulted (and injured in
any form). Report this fact and provide statements and evidence to
support these facts.
If you did take some reasonable actions to protect yourself and these
have been identified, interpreted, or presented as assaults, stick to your
evidence and don't be intimidated to accept culpability.
If they are argued to be 'excessive' actions then you may have to defend your
case. All defensive action have to be (or believed to be at the time) reasonable
& appropriate and in keeping with the circumstances and the level of 'any'
danger you believed existed at the time.
Clearly describe the all the risks to yourself, any children present and any
others who may have been affected by the person's actions. These effects may be
physical, emotional, psychological, social, economic, vocational, etc. Their
cumulative effect, one in relation to the others, is also important.
They may have been affecting your relationships with 'others' (including
children) and put you in compromised situation which you believed also put you
at risk of injury of any kind, from others, provoked by the behaviour you are
complaining about (defending against). Apart form assault upon yourself there
may be other, equally important, illegal actions that need considering.
Further Guidelines are provided.
If anyone has seen written Law, or legal advice, based
upon precedent, that the size, sex, sexual orientation, or any other physical,
or social
feature of a person makes them less likely to be the assailant, or the victim,
and that this feature therefore makes them less entitled of protection in law,
this website would like to see that reference and the evidence that supports it.
The police may have to learn to get their heads round this; but 'combinations
of size and sex' really do not matter. Police Officers and their managers are
not experts in Law. They administer it by following policies and guidelines.
Exceptions make Law.
Stick to the facts and events. Assault is assault & the Law is there to
remove the inclination to retaliate. That is what makes us civilised. You are
entitled to protection under the Law but, how this is administer is no longer
clear. Police have some clear obligations, in some serious incidents but other
responsibilities may lay else where.
Your Human Rights and Legal Entitlements are described by various agencies,
some of whom are listed and 'Externally Linked' on the right. These are UK
biased and for general Guidence. These links should open in new windows, or
separate tags, so you can keep contact with this page (let me know if this does
not happen).
You should also seek advice from any and many, agencies locally (Citizens
Advice, Victim Support) and research the internet in your own right. There is a
protected 'Google Search', filtered search engine below (Bottom of page).
This will filter out most of the rubbish and get reasonable links for you.
Always be discriminating.
The local
policy may direct police resources in a particular direction but this does not
remove your entitlements in Law, only your protection by 'police officers and
their support workers', in particular locality and for particular incidents.
Find out what protection you can expect to get from 'all sources'. Let each know
the involvement of the other.
Some situations are ambiguous but you know if you been violated and
that no one deserves this, whatever the background circumstances. You may
actually find yourself unable to immediately and adequately articulate, or
express, how you were violated.
Do your best. Report the incident\(s) to the police and make an initial
statement. Get help and advice in articulating the
evidence and then pursue the case with good support. You do not have to do these
things alone and justice is not restricted to the availability of Legal Aid, or
the lazy inclinations of Solicitors.
In some circumstances, because of past experiences, social prejudices and the
prevailing 'power' relationships within a group, or organisation, we may find
ourselves 'tolerating' physically intrusion in ways that are unacceptable and
are injurious, in that the perpetrators behaviour is humiliating, controlling
inappropriate, embarrassing.
If that behaviour included uninvited and inappropriate physical, particularly
'sexual', touching (and suggestive comments and non-verbal innuendoes), and you
request, or even discrete attempt to demonstrate, that it should cease, but the
behaviour continues, that, I believe, constitutes an assault and should be
reported and strongly pursued with the police, whatever you sex, age, or or
inclination.
Conserving the evidence and recording the events is therapeutic as well as
important for securing a satisfactory outcome to any charge that you eventually
wish to support, with the police backing, or not. Give this evidence to a
solicitor, if the police are not interested. Have it on record, somewhere
'formal'.
There are times that you may have doubts about circumstances and the sequence
of events, this is natural, especially if you have been a a 'target' of an
ongoing crime of assault, as in 'Relationship abuse', or where you have given
evidence of some wrong doing. Both
Victim Support &
Witness Support
may be an appropriate services to solicit help from.
Some confusion and doubt can arise if you have been drinking, or taking
drugs. These are 'normal' circumstances in which these various criminal and
civil 'incidents' can happen. It does
not excuse them. Record, or report, what you can immediately and return to
clarify and update your 'evidence' when you have had time to recover from all
effects.
Record what you can, or give your accounts to someone in authority at the
earliest opportunity. This could be the police, if they get there quickly. It
could be the Doctor, or a nurse treating you. It could be a a close friend, or
anyone with some credible standing in the community, or one of its institutions,
Local Councillor, MP, etc.
Police response vary dependent upon location but they also vary according to
the immediacy of the danger. Police responses to rape are now very good, the
response to common assault are sometimes quite poor, if the assailant has gone
from the scene.
If you give the impression it is all over they will often delay coming,
especially on Friday and Saturday nights and the early hours of the next
mornings. When in shock we sometimes perform too well and go into a kind of
'calm'.
Assume the worst, that the person is still about in the locality, just
outside the door. Threatening someone else, is likely to explode again. Do
whatever you need to do to get the 'emergency' across to them.
Prejudices Still Exist
- Some Institutional:
Age, Sex, Race, Colour & Class Issues Remain:
If you are a young man, who has been assaulted by another man, or, worse
still, if you are complaining that you have been assaulted by a woman (perhaps a
spouse) the response is likely to be very poor, especially if the incident of 'assault'
is over. If there are other social class & cultural features that may colour
attitudes, the problem is worsened.
There are prejudices, I am afraid. Men, young men in particular, men and
women, with common accents and attitudes, men reporting assaults by women, where
there is a counter claim, men and women who have been on the wrong side of the
law, even where this did not involve assaults, all get inferior treatment by the
average police officer.
The worst officers can even be quite offensive and treat
some people, who they judge in this way, as if they were the perpetrators, rather
than the victim of assault. It is in the character of any official position, or
profession, that you will get good and bad and that you may catch someone on a
bad day. Complain to them first. If the attitude persists, complain higher, but
always record the complaints with someone else in authority.
I have personally experienced a 5 day delay after having my tooth knocked
out, mouth and face cut by fists and nose blooded and swollen. The assailant was
driving up and down the road outside the family Home, drunk, having made further
threats to injure and burn the house and car. Behaviour he had exhibited before.
I have even heard of cases where the victim (who had suffered a number of
associated assaults) has said 'I have got the bastard here and I have a knife at
his throat'. The police were pretty annoyed but their response was very quick.If you get to the hospital before the police arrive on the scene, take all
your current clothing with you and ask the hospital staff to store it carefully
and take note of your condition and take photographs of the injuries prior to
treatment, if this is viable.
A sever beating, where you are conscious and able to report the call and
where the assailant has gone from the scene, will often mean a delay. If you
have been raped and/or are female, police responses are usually quicker and
treated as an emergency, even where the assailant has gone and you are safe.
This is because police responses and attitudes, regarding rape, had been poor
and this resulted in criticism and government interventions. Do not rely on
this, however. It is important that you emphasis the continuing immediate danger
to yourself and to others.
If you feel you would like to deal with an officer of the same sex, this is
usually possible but may not be immediately available because of pressures. Your
wishes will usually be respected but be aware, if you are rude and abusive to
the police, for any, including justifiable reasons, they will almost certainly
withhold or delay their support.
Future Guidence:
If you find yourself in one of those situations where the attack is still in progress. You
are held prisoner, or fear leaving because the assailant is still in the
immediate vicinity, tell the police this (if you can or course, perhaps going to
the toilet, etc.), they are likely to respond quicker.
Mobile phones are useful for this and if you are able to do an emergency
call, without speaking, it will at least get the emergency services interested
in what is happening. In defending yourself try and give them them clues of you
whereabouts, without giving away the phone is in use.
Any physical intrusion, or physical constraint, that is not Lawfully
Undertaken, with the least necessary force and for good reason of protecting
yourself, or others, is an assault by any standards. What constitutes an assault
is Law is slightly different and will vary from country to country and over
time.
Start by assuming it is an assault, unless there are obvious indicators that
this is a 'legal' intervention. In any case, if there is risk of injury, protect
yourself as well as you can, using as much force as you feel necessary to
protect yourself, then remove yourself, as quickly as you can, from the
situation.
Fighting back in revenge and anger is likely to wear you out and, if your
assailant is bigger, stronger, fitter, or less inhibited than you, you are
likely to become tired before them and suffer further injury. Try and stay calm
and plan your next more coolly. Hopefully by doing this, they will be more
nervous than you and will make mistakes.
If the attack is of a sexual nature and you are thinking calmly before the
attack has progressed too far, it is worth bearing in mind that sex attackers
will often like the 'fight' that tends to ensue. If you are calm and
'sympathetic, this may disable them.
If you play like 'sister' (or 'brother'), this may disable the person even
more. There are no guarantees but try what you can, think on you feet. Mention
things that may put them off, use your imagination, but don't overplay your act.
The idea is to bid for time and opportunity. To delay without inflaming and
possibly even disabling them. It is also a chance to assess the person and the
situation. Opportunity to collect information.
If any approach seems to become counter productive, switch strategy suddenly,
but not too dramatically, then blow hot & cold (warm & cool would be a better
description). Sometimes creating 'uncertainty' can disorientate and disempower
an attacker. Mild anger and frustration, alternating with frustrated tears can
be disabling & buy you time. You may have used this before, in personal
relationships.
If you feel brave enough and it 'feels' right at the time (especially if you
have reached the point where you feel you have nothing to loose) you could try
the 'bring it on' approach. This is not saying 'do it', that is not a good
strategy, but it is a kind of "Well, if you are going to do this, why not get on
with it, 'BUT' " approach. Some may call it 'passive aggressive' style.
Judge what words to use and the style, on the basis of what you have learned
so far. Something like: "OK go with it boy/man/girl, if you can/must - if this
is the only way you can get off!" , " . . . . if this is the way you make
yourself 'feel' big", " . . . . . god, how pathetic can you get", " . . . . .
why do you have to be so selfish", " . . . . . god, I just cant be
bothered with all this". " . . . . . I have had enough now - get on with it for
f**k sake".
This style of approach can be 'paradoxical'; Where the person feels that they
have permission in some way, but at the same time, it doesn't not feel real and
(& here is the BUT), they have lost some of the power & control, the price they
are paying is a 'put down' of some kind (the subtler the better - keeps them
thinking).
If the person 'feels' put down but does not know 'how' it happened, it can be
very disempowering. If you do get skilled at this, never use it on a
'friend'. In being subtle, you also reduce the risk of an immediate violent
reaction to the being put down. The more you make them think and struggle with
what is happening the more time you buy.
Try out subtle put downs and 'disempowerments' with friends (with their
agreement of course) and see how far you can push these. Alternative, find a
real, deserving target, like a bullying boss, or, but start of very gentle and
build up.
This kind of approach is called 'paradoxical' because it set up a paradox for
the person. Practice it and get it right and it can be very powerful. I use a
form of this in Therapy, when someone is having a bad time letting go of blaming
themselves for something terrible that has happened, which they could not have
had anything 'directly' to do with.
After the usual attempts to reassure the person and mitigate the distress
they are feeling, I will quite suddenly, but gently say something like; Well,' .
. . . perhaps you are right . . . .maybe you did have a part to play
on it! They will usually then respond by arguing the opposite to what I have
said. they snap out of blaming themselves, or are so stunned that I would
suggest something so ridiculous they they realise they were too.
Then play the 'pseudo passive' role; where you are still resisting but not in
any apparently 'active' way. You become more loose & more relaxed but position
yourself and take postures that make it hard work to get a purchase on you, or
access too you. You are actually playing 'incompetent', appearing unable to
competently
Use this strategy for as long as it buys you some time. If it wears thin, or
increased aggression, or 'excitement', switch to another strategy, 'slightly'
opposite to the current one. Get a sense, if you are given the time, of what is
working and what antagonises the situation. Information is key to you gaining
and maintaining control. Giving 'false impressions' is you opportunity to
confuse and confound, taking away control from them.
Practice other possibilities with friends. Think how you have dealt with
obstreperous partners, boyfriends, girlfriend, brothers & sisters. You can play
the the warm and cool physical strategy too; in this scenario you are physically
'active resistive' & then become 'pseudo passive resistive'. Both cases are
resisting but the method changes:
In being 'actively resistive' you are 'actively' resisting attempts of
assault in some way (any way you reasonably and safely can really), in the case
of 'pseudo passive' resistance, you just get into a position and 'loosen up' in
ways where it is difficult for the person to get purchase on, and access to you.
It is an act, you are in control and they have to respond. By constantly
doing this in varying ways you put them at some disadvantage and you gain
confidence and increased control over your situation.
Basically you need to get to the basic character of the person. What
basically makes them tick. Is it to do with Power, is it Sex, is it Frustration,
Impotence, Stupidity, Drunkenness, Drugs. Are they Psychotic, Cold, Calculating,
Cocky, Confident, Vindictive,
You have to judge the situation, but if you have nothing to loose just adjust
the punch line to suit the level of danger. If the 'injury' danger is 'very
high' then a more submissive punch line is called for. If the general 'injury'
danger is 'low'
It is your call. Do what you need to do at the time and stay as calm as you
can, taking note of features and things said. This will be useful later. Use any
object near to hand and use it in your defence, with the minimum of force
necessary to disable the attack, without intending to permanently damage someone
and only with the intention to defend yourself adequately.
Sexual Molestation, Intimidation and
Humiliation.
Some of these events constitute and
assault in Law also. If you wish to
proceed along this route, do so, but be warned, there can be a problem with
evidence in these cases. Follow our guidelines and get legal advice and support
as soon as you can.
Most advisors would say - go with it, record your claim of assault with the
police. Record all the details relating to the incident and get witnesses names,
contact numbers and addresses, where you can.
If it is in a work situation there are other procedures and processes you can
follow. If it is the boss, or a colleague, there are some pretty powerful
actions that you can take.
Make sure, whatever the situation, you inform someone in authority at that
location, be it work, a pub, club, or even art gallery, police station, or
museum. Then tell someone in authority in the community and at least one good
friend.
Have a good 'calm and calculating' friend with you at each stage in the
process and get legal representation if you can. Persist with your action and
use every legal avenue.
Record all further attempts at humiliation and intimidation that follow on
from this. Record and Report these activities in as fine detail as you can and
then summarise each of the incidents, factors and consequences for yourself.
This will serve a good purpose in helping you feel better and more empowered.
It is therapeutic to do it. It also means that you have laid down good evidence
for when the authorities eventually do take it seriously. If they don't it may
make a good basis for a newspaper report.
This section is still in construction.
Physical Molestation, Intimidation and
Humiliation.
See the Section on 'Assault' and then come back to this section.
If it is in a work situation there are other procedures and processes you can
follow. If it is the boss, or a colleague, there are some pretty powerful
actions that you can take. If you are, or have been in a relationship with the
person see next section also.
Make sure, whatever the situation, you inform someone in authority at that
location, be it work, a pub, club, or even art gallery, police station, or
museum. Then tell someone in authority in the community and at least one good
friend.
Have a good 'calm and calculating' friend with you at each stage in the
process and get legal representation if you can. Persist with your action and
use every legal avenue.
Record all further attempts at humiliation and intimidation that follow on
from this. Record and Report these activities in as fine detail as you can and
then summarise each of the incidents, factors and consequences for yourself.
This will serve a good purpose in helping you feel better and more empowered.
It is therapeutic to do it. It also means that you have laid down good evidence
for when the authorities eventually do take it seriously. If they don't it may
make a good basis for a newspaper report.
This
section is still in construction.
Personal & Relationship Abuse - Physical &
Sexual
See the Section on 'Assault' and then come back to this section.
If it is in a work situation, where you have a personal relationship with
your boss or a colleague, there are other procedures and processes you can
follow. If it is the boss, or a colleague, there are some pretty powerful
actions that you can take.
Make sure, whatever the situation, you inform someone in authority at that
location, be it work, a pub, club, or even art gallery, police station, or
museum. Then tell someone in authority in the community and at least one good
friend.
Have a good 'calm and calculating' friend with you at each stage in the
process and get legal representation if you can. Persist with your action and
use every legal avenue.
Record all further attempts at humiliation and intimidation that follow on
from this. Record and Report these activities in as fine detail as you can and
then summarise each of the incidents, factors and consequences for yourself.
This will serve a good purpose in helping you feel better and more empowered.
It is therapeutic to do it. It also means that you have laid down good evidence
for when the authorities eventually do take it seriously. If they don't it may
make a good basis for a newspaper report.
This
section is still in construction.
Personal & Relationship Abuse -
Psychological & Emotional
See the Section on 'Assault' and then come back to this section.
There are many documents on these web pages that you can research - use our
search engines for information on site and at other locations.
Links will be placed here soon. Apologies for the delay.
This
section is still in construction.
Workplace Abuse - Physical, Psychological
& Emotional
See the Section on 'Assault' and then come back to this section.
In a work situation there are other procedures and processes you can follow.
If it is the boss, or a colleague, there are some pretty powerful actions that
you can take.
Make sure, whatever the situation, you inform someone in authority at that
location, be it work, a pub, club, or even art gallery, police station, or
museum. Then tell someone in authority in the community and at least one good
friend.
Have a good 'calm and calculating' friend with you at each stage in the
process and get legal representation if you can. Persist with your action and
use every legal avenue.
Record all further attempts at humiliation and intimidation that follow on
from this. Record and Report these activities in as fine detail as you can and
then summarise each of the incidents, factors and consequences for yourself.
This will serve a good purpose in helping you feel better and more empowered.
It is therapeutic to do it. It also means that you have laid down good evidence
for when the authorities eventually do take it seriously. If they don't it may
make a good basis for a newspaper report.
If it is in a work situation, where you have a personal relationship with
your boss or a colleague, it may be necessary to take action through the police.
Don't let the relationship inhibit you from getting protection
This
section is still in construction.
Child Abuse - Physical, Sexual,
Psychological & Emotional
See the Section on 'Assault' and then come back to this section.
If you are a 'Child' of any age, I suggest that you go to the 'Childline'
website, or phone
Childline: 0800 1111. The
NSPCC Help Line for adults: 0808 800 5000,
NSPCC Under 18 Web Site, may also be helpful for Adults
The police are now more sensitive to these issues and there are special
Interview Suites, with support workers. Contact the police immediately, if you
feel able. Social Services have 'obligations' and they do not always deal wit
situations intelligently and sensitively.
You may understand some of the difficulties that these organisations can
create, in attempting to help you, You may fear making contact with them. Adults
can be quite stupid and insensitive in their help, I know that, so do others in
these organisations.
YOU are the person experiencing these distressing problems. Make sure that
you let people know what your wishes are and only tell people what you
want to tell them at that time you feel able to:
- Take things at your pace and make sure people respect 'all' your wishes
and do things at a pace that 'you' feel comfortable with.
- Make sure that they make commitments to respect all your wishes, even if
they do not agree with them. Tell them any reasons why you are reluctant.
- You know things that they don't, and may never understand fully. You are
the expert in your own experiences & your wishes are important, more than
anyone knows.
- You have to be made safe, but this should be in the least restrictive
way, for you and your brothers and sisters and your parents (in that order).
- If it is your fear that the family will be broken up. That fear is real.
It does happen. Just be aware that it does not have to be that way.
(This could be more abusive and distressing than what has happened to you).
- YOU decide & then 'tell them'. Its your body, your
feeling, your family.
- If you decide that you want to protect your family from this, insist
that you know the 'obligations' they have (things they must do). Let them
know that 'you' know, there are different 'options' available and get
them to discuss these with you first.
- It is important that you get help and protection, along with the your
brothers and sisters. The decisions you have to make are very difficult and
distressing. You are brave to start this and thoughtful to do this wisely.
- Once you have got the reassurance you have been asking for, Report your
experiences and fears only to someone you trust, or who has some
authority. If at any stage you are unhappy with the person you are
disclosing to - say so, politely.
- If you still feel you feel unable to talk to the police, or social
services, at least talk to someone on Childline. Keep the 'trusted' people
in your life up to date with how things are
- Make a stand with the person that is being abusive, tell the other
parent. If this does not work; go stay with another Relation that you know
well and tell them the problem. Do not allow yourself to continue to be
abused, by anyone.
Do all this this with a friend, if you feel you have to, but never go
anywhere with anyone you do not know. Have them come to you, on your own safe
ground, at school, at a friends house, at a relations house, a police station,
social services office, etc.
Otherwise use the telephone links to official support organisations, where
their details are clearly available and you are able to identify who and where
they are. This site has no postal address at present. We do not 'qualify' on
that basis. To help here the following information is available:
I live in the Trowbridge, Wiltshire Area and can be contacted through Paul
Sheppard at 62 New Road, Trowbridge, Wiltshire BA14 7AF. I work for Wiltshire
Social Services, The Civic Hall, Trowbridge, Wiltshire. I work at Green Lane
Hospital in Devizes. If you wanted to check on 'who I am', or have a complaint
about my conduct, these are locations that you can use to inform anyone you
choose.
Get advice else where also: Get information from the internet but never
arrange to meet up with anyone on the basis of any internet contact 'including
from this site'. Get information from lots of sources and use you intelligence,
wisdom and 'guts' to decide what is safe.
If you fear the consequences for yourself, choose the support that you feel
will give you the best help in the way that you want it. If you fear the
consequences for your family, or the person who has abused you, this will be
understood and appreciated' 'if you make it clear that it is of concern for
you'.
You are the person in this situation. Make sure people respect your wishes,
whatever your age. Insist that they go at your pace and take your wishes into
account. If they don't - complain but don't get too angry.
Some people who you get support from will have been in your situation, some
will not. There are benefits to be gained from both types of supports. You are
an individual already, or you would not be here.
Your needs and wishes may be different to that of someone else. Those
differences should be respected at all stages of what you are doing. Don't let
people forget that. Be polite but 'insist' that you be heard and that all your
wishes continue to be respected.
If you feel you want to comment on this advice and make suggestions, email
me. I promise I will respect your comments and suggestions. We may not fully
agree but your genuine request and you view, will be included, along with my own
and others.
If you have any difficulties at any point, please come back. We will continue
to add help and suggestions and make corrections.
Thank you
This
section is still in construction.
Vulnerable Adult - Physical,
Psychological, Emotional & Financial
See the Section on 'Assault' and then come back to this section.
This
section is still in construction.
Institutional Abuse - Physical,
Psychological, Emotional & Financial
See the Section on 'Assault' and then come back to this section.
This
section is still in construction.
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